Tuesday, 10 February 2015

One Tired Mummy Here!

Being Tillys Mummy isn't always easy and quite often I am too tired to do much with her at the weekends. I am working out of town, which involves a 2 hour bus ride to work and then 2 hours home, Meaning I rarely get to do the school run anymore and I am really feeling the strain. I am having to rely heavily on my support network to help out and to be the mother that I sometimes cant be.

Tilly is my last baby and I seem to be missing out on her growing up! I seem to be a part time mum, who is always stressed and tired. Tilly has also started to notice how it is affecting us and for a 4 year old, she is very very wise indeed. She has asked me to give up my job and get a job as a dinner lady. I have given nearly 10 years to my place of work and I am kind of thinking maybe it is time for me to do something completely different.

At the moment I am struggling with the work/home balance and as hard as it is to admit, I feel like I am losing a battle that I really want to win! I feel like in the blink of the eye, my littlest baby will be grown up and I will have missed so much of her life as I put work first.

The stress within the family is always high due to everyone else having to help around my job! Its a job I love, yet its a job that is slowly tearing me apart. I feel like I am failing my family and I feel there is definatly not enough support out there for working parents. The government certainly do not make it easy.

So in reality what is my choice? To work from home as a freelancer/blogger without regular income but have a happy child and a harmonious home or carry on working myself to death for a company I love working for and missing the special moments with my children, especially little Miss.? I know its a choice only I can make, but its such a hard choice. Afterall we cant live on fresh air!

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