Thursday, 19 November 2015

They Failed My Family

There is sensitive information in this post and it isn't an easy one to read.

Tuesday 27th October at 5.12pm, The moment of my life I will never forget. That was the moment all hope I had in the British judicial system failed my family, failed the members of the public and most importantly failed my daughter and grand daughter.

This was the moment that a friend let me know about Nathan Green being given the label of 'paedophile' all over Facebook. All though we knew it was coming and every few days over the past few months, we had been googling his name - it was still one hell of a shock to read about. To read the severity of his crimes and feel physically sick that he was actually grooming my grand daughter into a life of paedophilia before she was even born was a shock to us all.
Nathan Green was found guilty of his crimes, He was found guilty of possessing and distributing 41 still images and 2 videos at the worst Category A on Green's computer hard drive, 62 images and 2 videos at catehory B and 202 stills and 2 videos at Category C. He also offered to share his unborn baby with other paedophiles worldwide.

This man has invaded our life, he has stolen my daughter and he has deprived me of a grand daughter. I welcomed him into my family and I treated him like a son. I let him take my own 5 year old daughter out in his car with my older daughter. I let a paedophile in to my home. My little girl was 4 at the time and I am sickened that at this time, she would simply get undressed and walk around with just a pair of knickers on. Luckily she never got undressed when he was in my house, because I never really knew him and although I tried to welcome him into my family I was still suspicious as I would of been with any man in my life. BUT had he not been arrested on 6th March 2015, you never know what would have happened. Would my own baby have been at risk?

Since being charged Green had been open and honest about his perversions and was already part way through a sex offender course Really? Not once has he been open and honest about his perversions to us, the family of his child. He has even told my daughter that she isn't to talk to us about it. This man has groomed my daughter and is controlling every aspect of her life. My grand daughter is in care with the local authority and I have never met her because my daughter told me, Nathan doesn't want us to see the baby. Nathan has pressured her to not let us have the baby too. She wants the baby to come to us, she has told us verbally yet she has said Nathan doesn't want the baby to come to us. He is a vile, disgusting monster who controls every part of my daughters life and he is ripping everything away from me. This man should of been put away! His crimes were described as 'revolting' by the judge, yet he still let him walk from the court. Why would a judge find a person guilty of the crimes Nathan committed yet only sentence him to 2 years sentence suspended for 18 months. He also placed Nathan on the sex offenders list for only 10 years, so in ten years time he is free to interact with children legally again.

So now I have to face my first Christmas ever without my complete family. My daughter will be missing from the Christmas dinner and the first Christmas with the new baby that we had looked forward to so much has been stolen away from us. Tilly is asking for her sister all the time and is full of questions about what had happened, It hurts so much to know she has lost some of her innocence over whats happened. It hurts that I have to see her crying for her sister and we have to try an explain why Beth can't see her. You see my daughter is still with Nathan, its all part of the grooming and no matter what we say to her she won't leave him. So I had to make a difficult choice of walking away. Its not a choice I made lightly, but all the time she is sharing her Life with Nathan Green, I can't risk my own little girl being involved with her. Tilly is allowed telephone contact, but no more skyping and no visiting.

As a mother I feel failed, failed by the police for not alerting us when he was arrested in March, failed by the Social Services for not letting us know how bad the situation with the baby was, and not even letting us know of the result of the court case - instead I read the vile things online. Failed by the judge for letting this man walk the street, failed by my ex husband for not telling me about Nathan being arrested for child porn at the time, Instead he knew that Tilly could of been at risk and he chose not to act like a responsible parent, and he kept it from us. I feel failed by the whole system for putting Britain at risk by letting this man walk free from court.

But also as a mother I know this has made me stronger as a person, I suffer from Bipolar and not once did I let this horrible person take away my dignity, my happiness and cause me to slip into depression. I turned it into something positive and I distracted myself. There were a few tears, but I grieved for the daughter and granddaughter I have lost. Now I feel ready to share this story.

My world has changed forever and I will never let a man be welcome into my home again, I will never trust a new man that wants to be part of our life. And every person that looks at Tilly is now guilty of atrocities, my new philosophy is guilty until proven innocent. Every time I see someone with dark hair and a beard, my heart skips a beat as I think its Nathan, his face is everywhere! Kim and I made the choice of supporting Social Services in finding my grand daughter a new home. If she lives with anyone in our family, then Nathan will know where she is. She will still be in danger from him and his circle of friends. If my grand daughter came to stay with us, then it puts Tilly at risk and any other grandchildren born into the family. We will always be looking over our shoulder to see if Nathan is around. The baby is safer with a new identity with a new family, In a new town. As much as it breaks my heart to know we will never meet her, it would break my heart more if Nathan got close to her and hurt her.

 Please sign this petition to get this monster off the streets

My friends and family have been amazing, they have been my whole support network throughout this whole horrific time, They have wiped my tears, held my hand and let me know they are there for us. They have shown me the real meaning of friends and the ones that weren't there don't deserve to be part of our life. I want to publicly thank you all of these people for being there for us and without your support I don't think I would of got through the last few months. My children have been amazing and we have bonded even more, we have become closer and we will get through this.

**Disclaimer - I spent a long time deciding whether to name Nathan Green in a blog post or not but as all this in my blog post is already on the world wide web, then It is already common knowledge**

This is my own work and feelings, any copying or taking any of the content without my permission will not be tolerated and therefore I do not give my permission for any copying or content taking.


  1. Well done for posting this you and your family have been through so much and I can not even begin to imagine what it must have been like that very first time you found out the truth about him. I really hope one day your daughter realises and finds the courage to leave him. I want to give you a huge hug x

  2. I am so, so sorry to hear of everything you and your family have been through. It's an absolute outrage that Nathan Green hasn't been sent to prison! I wish that things were different so you could have your grandchild in your care and that your daughter would return home to you. What a sick and twisted world we live in :(
    Sending big virtual hugs Xxx

  3. It's a shame your daughter chose him over her own child and I only hope she gets therapy to see what he's done to her.
    I feel for you as I imagine you may have had pressure to take on your grandchild and relocate by social services. I hope they find a perfect forever family to help ease your pain

    1. I totally get your comment about her choosing her boyfriend over her baby but what a lot of people don't understand is that he spent 3 years grooming her online before they finally met. Three years to make her see things from his view and 3 years to brain wash her. 3 years that I just thought they were friends. Then another year of living together now and she has been brainwashed by him. This is like domestic violence where the partner abuses you physically and mentally until you come round to their way of thinking. She has no idea that anything is wrong because that's what he has done to her. So it's not as simple as her choosing the boyfriend over the child.
      I know a few months ago I would of wondered how a mother could choose her partner over her child but now I see it from a totally different perspective. Hopefully she will see sense and leave him but these monsters are clever and they take every bit of you self respect , your dignity and your confidence away. I know they will find her a nice home with a family who yearn for a child.

  4. Well done vicky, on speaking out about this vile excuse of a human being. You are a brave, brave lady. Having read the crimes he is charged with I am shocked that he isn't locked up. I am sorry that he has deprived you and your family of a daughter/sister and a grandaughter/niece. I am sorry that he is still able to control Beth to the point she can't see what he really is. This is and awful story with a heartbreaking finish but yiu have stayed so strong throughout and done what was best for Tilly. You should feel proud of yourself amongst all them other feelings. Xxx

  5. What a hideous situation to have to live through. I admire your strength and I hope you are able to remain resolute in your decision to not let this get the better of you! Sending lots of love and possitivity to you all xx

    1. Thankyou for the comment and love. Sometimes I don't feel strong, but know i have to carry on for the rest of my family

  6. I left a lovely sweet lad for another. A man who I thought cared for me but really he was manipulating me, brainwashing me, making me do things that were wrong. I was raped, I got pregnant, went through an abortion aged 16 and even after telling my side of the story I was still called cruel things because I had an abortion. I got lucky and got out of that man's clutches. He still stalks me but I have tried my best to keep hidden and so far he's not made contact with me in 5 years, though tried to contact a friend of mine 3 years ago. I feel awful for your family and your daughter. It was the hardest thing for me to get out of that relationship and I can imagine as she's been groomed for so long now she may be in too deep to simply get herself out. I hope one day she does. Thank you for sharing x

    1. Thank you so much for sharing, You were so lucky to be able to get away, but I imagine its hard to carry on knowing that he is still out there. People never understand a situation untill they live it. I wish you all the best for the future xx

  7. I am confident she will one day, but until then I have to take a step back and wait for her to make the right choice xx

  8. I am confident she will one day, but until then I have to take a step back and wait for her to make the right choice xx

  9. I hope your daughter sees sense and packs her things to come home soon.
    Name and shame is the right thing. People need to be informed about Paedophiles. The judicial system has failed you so badly, its saying it's okay to be a Paedophile.
    There's something so wrong with Paedophiles there isn't an over night cure. He should be locked up and given the help he needs in prison.
    Sending you much love I hope there light at the end of the tunnel soon. Xx

  10. I am so sorry what an awful thing to happen. I have no faith in our justice system whatsoever. I hope that one day your daughter will be able to break free.


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