Being An Older Mum To A Preteen Daughter
Last Updated on: 30th May 2021, 11:54 pm
7 years ago I wrote a blog post about how hard it was at times to be an older mum. Tilly is 11 now and getting ready to go to secondary school. And you know what? Being an older mum hasn’t been as bad as I thought it would be.
There have been tough times through the years, like when Tilly was only 5 years old. And her sister disappeared from her life. She had moved away to be with her boyfriend. But it turned out he was a paedophile and and he offered his unborn child to other paedophiles on the dark web. It has left Tilly with anxiety and heartbreak, but that’s a conversation for another day. There were sad times when Zach went to work aboard, but he always came home. Until he got married and settled in Holland. Then he grew our family with his wife, Amber and baby Zoe.
There have been some awesome fun times too. The time I had to prove I wasn’t an old mum, I could still do what younger mums do. I packed Tilly up and took her around Europe for a month. Something we both needed. There have been so many awesome holidays since then. I wanted to make as many memories with Tilly as I could before I got too old.
Being An Older Mum With A Pre-teen
One of my biggest fears was being the oldest mum at the school gate, a bit like it was when I took Tilly to Toddler group. But you know what? I wasn’t the oldest mum! There were so many mums that were the same age as me. There was no need for me to be worried about being an older mum because age didn’t make a difference at all. Some of the people remembered us from when the older kids went to school.
I am 48 now and watching a pre-teen going through Puberty, at the moment it’s okay. I don’t know if it’s because I have been through it before and I am used to it. Or if she is just a more laid back and easier pre-teen. It might even be that she has her older sister still at home to talk to when she has a problem.
Looking back to when I was 19, I never thought that I would still be doing school runs at nearly 50 years old, but that’s the way it is and I wouldn’t change it. We still enjoy so many adventures together, although Covid has put a stop to that for the moment.
I think being 50 is the new 30!
Being a Grandma now
I am a real grandma now, not just one that is mistaken for a granny because I became an older mum. Zoe was born right at the start Covid 19. We managed to see her when she was born. Then we got out there in July for a week. We squeezed as much in as we could, but then borders closed again. So Zoe and I have a video call relationship. I am the Grandma who lives in the phone.
But if Covid had happened 10 or 20 years ago, we wouldn’t have had the technology that we have today. We wouldn’t have video calls to see her grow. She is awesome and beautiful. And Tilly is an aunty at 11 years old, which is an awesome age gap between aunty and niece.
Getting Older
So by the time Tilly finishes school, I will be 55. That is nearly 60. When my gran was 60, she seemed so old. But I think times have changed so much. 30 years ago, the age of 60 was old. Old ladies would have a shampoo and set, that made them look and seem older. Nowadays 60 is not old – or so I keep telling myself. I still don’t feel like I am being an older mum, because Tilly is still keeping me younger.
I can see my body getting older, but my mind is young and active. All the time i think young, I will stay young.
